Friday, November 27, 2015

Crappy movies for after Thanksgiving

With Thanksgiving over we move from turkeys to just plain crappy

Way too talky film concerns a woman looking for her missing brother in post war Japan.She gets mixed up with an ex-service man about three feet taller than her (no really he's huge). It all goes wrong- for both the characters and the audience.

Weakly acted, cheaply made the whole thing is set bound. Little actually happens. Its mostly talk. I got bored real fast. I wouldn't have cared but it just isn't good or bad enough to enjoy.

SHOCK (197-) (aka Beyond the Door 2)
Mario Bava's more or less final film is a major disappointment. While not quite a turkey it is, as the title of this post says, crappy. The plot of the film has a mother, her new husband and her son moving into a house. Things are going along fine for a while until the son begins to talk to and become possessed by his dead dad. An occasional great shock moment aside  (the son running to the mother changing into the dead father kicks ass, especially when you consider it was done without computers and took multiple takes to get right) this film is a turkey. The special effects are uneven, the performance by the actor playing the son is uneven and the plot twists are WTF material.  By the time the film ended I was roaring with laughter. This is just not a good film.

Bad found footage film about the Bell Witch (a supposed real ghost) trying to come back. The footage is in desperate need of an editor and some one to point the camera at something so we can actually see it.
Pure crap.

Top billed Corey Feldman is in this for just over a minute. Another evil entity tries to cross over this time at a haunted house Halloween attraction. Apparently it was filmed at a real scare park. They should have filmed a trip through its confines instead of giving us this crappy story.

Jaw droppingly awful western has a show girl saddling up and taking on bandit terrorizing a western town. Words can't describe this film.  How bad is it? There is a musical number in the old west where a piano, a banjo and a guitar sound like rock band with electric instruments and a full horn section. The mind boggles. Films like this are why I hated westerns for years

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